His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
