is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
