i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Damn victory sex feels great
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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