so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
