Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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