That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
