i think my mom watched the whole time
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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