Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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