OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
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