wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
How external is "for external use only"?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
