don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
my liver is dry heaving
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize