Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize