i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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