i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
you made out with another girl for some wings
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
