fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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