After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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