Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
