yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
