toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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