Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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