and i looked up. we had an audience...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
