Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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