youre lurking in front of me
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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