plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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