I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Help. Why am I so naked?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
