New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
