It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Im part way to drunk.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
