I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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