We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize