Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
