when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
