Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
