It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize