doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
