I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize