You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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