If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
