I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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