there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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