if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
