I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
And then my night got REAL pukey
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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