drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
