Barsexuality is the new black.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
