Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
