Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
