ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
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