I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
