would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
