Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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