I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
