i just wanna soil my oats bro
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
