At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Randomize
