would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
